God can use snowflakes.

Heeeellllloooo!  I just want to post on how nice God is! 

Today I drove my dad to pick up his car from the shop .. which took basically all my motivation and energy for the day.  I got back home, and was so tired I didn't even feel like getting out of the car.  So... I sat in my car in the driveway and of course started to fall into a bad mood.  There are things I want to do in my mind, but then I nix 'em off because things just don't seem worth doing compared to how much work I have to put in to do them.  So I sat in my car listening to music (on my phone -- I turned the car off! have to include that for all the people who will say I was wasting gas ::cough dad cough:: :P) and I got this thought in my mind, which was now in a bad mood.  Maybe some days I just have to "fake it to make it".  Sometimes, you're going to be in a bad mood, and it's not going to be an easy day -- but pretend it is.  Pretend you're healthy, don't think about the effort, and hopefully that'll put me in a better mood and maybe even trick my body into being healthier? (mind over body?)  Some days are just aggrivating, but if you let yourself sink into the frustration... your outlook on the whole day is different, resulting in either feeling happier and getting stuff done.. or having a pity party on my couch yet again lol -- and I still think that's true... But that wasn't true for today.

For today -- God intervened before I could start to fake it.  I know it sounds sooo dumb -- but it as I was sitting in my car... it started snowing.  It was so beautiful to just sit there and watch the flakes come slowly at first, and then with more gusto, all around and on my car.  I loved it, and as soon as it started I knew it was God giving me a little gift to cheer me up.  I loved it.  I sat and watched, and before I knew it, I was in a better mood and not faking it! haha

I was recently listening to this song "After All" by Meredith Andrews -- and one part says "You were whispering your promise, even when I could not hear" -- and that is just so awesome -- how many time do I ignore God, or choose to stay in my slump instead of listening for him?  Even when I'm not listening, God is still pouring out his love upon me, upon us.  How many times do you reach out to someone who's ignoring you, not appreciative of you, taking you for granted?  My answer would be very few.  I stop reaching out to them -- but when we do that with God ... he still doesn't stop.  Blows my mind <3

Also, while listening to the music in the car, Audrey Assad's "known" came on the playlist.  This is the chorus:
         "Savior, You have known me as I am.  Healer, You have known me as I was, as I will be.  In the morning, in the evening, You have known me."

Jesus knows me.  He knows when I'm cranky in the morning, and when I perk up at night.  He knows every thought, whether spoken or not, good or bad.  He knows the desires of my heart, and the longings that I haven't even come to realize yet...

And he knows me coughing, hyperventilating, low oxygen, high heart rate, tired, weak.  He knows me with CF infesting my lungs.  But what struck me about that line is... He knows me without it, too.  He knows the exact moment in time when I take that first breath withOUT CF in my lungs.  He knows what my oxygen levels, lung functions, and heart rates will all be on the day that he takes CF out of my lungs -- whether that's through His supernatural power, or through transplant.  (and right now, I'm thinking he's going to use transplant lol but of course I don't know his plans)  My Healer knows me as I WILL be.  How awesome is that?!

And I just have to say this too... I can't get over how great God's thoughts, ways, plans, etc are.  He knit us together.  He knows every cell, every hair, everything.  And if it's his will that I get transplanted, he was thinking of that when he was making those lungs.  He was planning an abundant life in HIM for that person, and planning my healing at the same time.  How sweet is Jesus!

Ps -- sorry I'm writing so much about transplant lately.. but as you can guess.. it's kinda on my mind.

Jesus already knows me healed because God is love.