Transplant: Well Hello ECMO

So... bi-pap worked for a few days but the next thing I knew here came the doctors walking into my little cubicle room again.  Bi-pap worked, but not enough and it was time to make a move with ECMO.  They wanted to put it in that day because as the doctor explained to me, "old people run and run and then start to slow down before they crash.. young people run and run and run and then crash... there's no way to tell before they go off the cliff."  We talked and I knew it was the right decision, although I didn't voice that to anyone else yet.  Before I could be the responsible adult that I am and tell everyone I decided to do the right thing and get ECMO, another doctor came in and told me I also needed to get a trach. 

Ok.. Rewind two days before -- my mom and I were talking.. we must have seen some smoking commercial or something with someone having a trach because somehow that topic came up.  Because of the severity of CF, it was decided years ago that if an instance came up that I can't communicate for myself, my parents make my medical decisions for me. And TWO DAYS before the doctor informed me I needed a trach this is what I said.. "Mom, I never want a trach.  If they ever want to put a trach in me, say no."

And now here I am being faced with the one procedure I said I never wanted.  It was a lot to handle and so I whipped out my phone right away and texted MY doctor who came in as soon as she could and explained to me why this was the best choice.  We made the decision to go for both the ECMO and the dreaded trach.

 I can't remember being prepped for surgery or going in or anything.  I DO remember waking up just for a second after surgery.  I opened my eyes and I didn't feel like I was working to breathe.  Actually.. I really didn't think I was breathing.. It was like I was living without having to breathe.. So of course I asked -- Am I breathing?  Now if you were me, this was a legit question but everyone else thought it was funny.  They told me I was and all I could say was "It's nice."

ECMO and the trach which was hooked up to a vent were breathing for me.  That combined with the wonderful drugs they gave me to knock me out and for pain made that hospital bed so comfortable, so I just closed my eyes and went back to sleep... breathing - maybe not in the traditional sense of using your lungs and all but as it turns out I'm not that traditional. 

 Fun fact - not every hospital has ECMO -- in fact.. most places don't know what it is.. But I can tell you what it is.  It's the machine that ended up saving my life. (ok, ok.. the trach was part of the life saving too as much as I hate to admit that).  It's no surprise to me that God sent us to NY Presbyterian Hospital.. because even before Jesus saved my life the first time, he knew he'd save it again through this machine.

I had my first life saving operation that day because God is love.